If Santa Claus played rugby – and why wouldn’t he – he’d undoubtedly play in the front row. The man loves a cookie, isn’t shy of downing a pint (of milk), is perpetually jolly and has an impressive waist and backside. He’s tailor-made for the pointy end of scrums.
More specifically he’d play hooker given he operates best behind a well-drilled pack of reindeer that function much like a rolling maul, dragging the big man over the line. Rudolph would be the set-piece general. Prancer the bulldozer into heavy traffic. Dasher the all-court virtuoso in the loose.
In this fantasy I’ve created, Santa still fulfils his main brief and delivers gifts, only they’re rugby related. So, tasked with the role of compiling a wish list for 2025, I’d like to send a message to the North Pole and hope old Papa Presents with the cauliflower ears hasn’t filled his quota.
Dear Santa, if you’re reading this, would you mind sorting a few of these out for me?
England’s women win the World Cup
It may seem odd wishing for the overwhelming favourites to win a tournament on home soil but this is the result that our sport needs. Anything other than an English triumph at Twickenham would constitute an upset, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be rooting for the Red Roses.
England talent Ellie Kildunne was recently named women’s world player of the year (Photo Morgan Harlow/The RFU Collection via Getty Images)
A trophy would serve as a tangible return on the RFU’s impressive investment in the women’s game. England rugby’s governing body has rightly copped a lot of criticism over the past 18 months but on this front they’ve been world leaders.
In Ellie Kildunne they have the game’s most outstanding player. They have a pack that consumes all before it and a domestic league that serves as both a lightning rod and a production line for elite-level talent. A World Cup would show other boards that taking the women’s game seriously leads to positive outcomes. Perhaps that might convince a few of them to follow suit.
A shift from the Saffas in the Champions Cup
Two weeks back the Sharks sent a rotated team to Leicester and got duly mauled by the Tigers in what is marketed as the best club competition in the world. Seven days later, for a domestic league fixture, coach John Plumtree fielded all his available big dogs including Ox Nche, Andre Esterhuizen and Aphelele Fassi. Siya Kolisi was a late – and mysterious – withdrawal – while Eben Etzebeth was still recovering from a concussion. Had they been available they’d have been on the roster too.
The Sharks it backwards, but they’re not the only ones. The Bulls and Stormers have likewise had their priorities muddled for the past three seasons. The South Africans involvement in the Champions Cup has not yielded positive results. The format has been a mess while the travel costs – both financially and to the environment – have not been justified. It’s becoming increasingly difficult to argue for their continued inclusion.
The Sharks, missing most of their front-line Springboks, were walloped by Leicester Tigers (Photo by David Rogers/Getty Images)
This could change if the respective coaches, team owners and boards decided to take the competition seriously, to place a premium on fixtures – home and away – and choose to field weakened teams instead in the URC in favour of having their Springboks available for the Champions Cup. On paper, all three sides should be challenging for the title. Right now they’re taking up space and wasting everyone’s time. A recalibration in mindset is what’s needed.
More love for the smaller nations
The international game has never been more competitive. World Rugby’s Pacific Nations Cup, as well as the scheduled second division of the World Rugby Nations Championship, allows so-called Tier Two nations more competitive rugby throughout the year. And with the 2027 World Cup expanding to 24 teams, the future looks brighter and more populated.
But as this is the season for extra portions and just one last glass of bubbles, I’m asking for more. I know it’s greedy, but I want to see even an increase in the number of games played between the established outfits and the up-and-comers.
Fiji, ranked ninth on World Rugby’s chart, have shown what is possible. But a chasm still exists between the elite and the chasing pack. The islanders’ gifted athletes, now playing either in Super Rugby or in Europe, were clattered by Ireland (52-17) and Scotland (57-17).
We must be careful not to create a caste system in our game. Cricket, especially Test cricket, is a perfect example of what can happen when a sporting biosphere becomes too closed off and too unwelcoming to those trying to gain a foothold. With only the occasional cross-Tier matches, there is a danger of this developing in rugby.
The All Blacks have not played in Fiji since 2011. England last played in Romania in 1989. South Africa’s last visit to Zimbabwe was in 1960 when both nations represented different flags. I recognise there is already too much rugby being played but we could achieve my wish with two tweaks.
Firstly we could implement a new law where the costs and profits of all Tests are shared between the hosts and the visitors. Secondly the so-called Tier One teams could send their development or under-20 sides. I doubt Uruguay would mind too much if France’s reserves showed up for an officially sanctioned Test series. Heck, while touring Argentina only five months ago, a rotated French XV played a midweek match in Montevideo. The game’s governing bodies have done well, but we’re just at the tip of the sport’s potential.
Now I know this will never happen, but this is a Christmas wish list after all. And as unlikely as this is, I know the next entry has practically no chance of ever coming true.
More pleasant debates online
What if we were all just a little more gentle, a little more relaxed, a little less serious about a game that involves adults running around like sugar-crazed toddlers? What if we didn’t fly off the handle when a RugbyPass editor doesn’t name your favourite player as the world’s best? What if you shrugged your shoulders rather than threw a tantrum when your favourite coach doesn’t receive universal love? What if you held your cool, rather than spew personal insults from your phone, when a journalist or content creator has a different opinion than your own.
Look, I know what this game can do to one’s mental and emotional state. I know the fate of an oval ball matters to millions. I’m South African. I was raised on the Kool-Aid served by Nelson Mandela. One of my earliest memories is the image of my father crying actual tears after Francois Pienaar lifted the Webb Ellis Cup in 1995. That image has stayed with me. Even when I’m critical of the Springboks, of their fans, of the way the game brings out the worst in so many people, I remember that image.
But let’s keep things in perspective this year, yeah? According to the World Meteorological Organisation 2024 will go down as the hottest year on record, taking the title held by 2023. Millions of people had their homes and lives devastated by floods, earthquakes, droughts and hurricanes. Countless more have had their families torn apart by falling bombs and drone strikes. Can we please get a bit of perspective?
Rugby is special because of its values. Decency and respect are woven into the fabric of this game but for some reason, when a website or social media page posts an opinion, this discourse quickly morphs into something toxic.
How about this: let’s actually enjoy rugby this year. Let us revel in Antoine Dupont’s genius or Cheslin Kolbe’s magic feet no matter who we support. Let us herald Ilona Maher as a trailblazer without resorting to lazy sexist tropes. Let’s treat the mistakes of referees and players as just that; mistakes. We’d all be better for it.
Lions to win a trophy this season
Rather than spend my final wish on a competitive Lions series or the Springboks beating the All Blacks in New Zealand, I’d like to see some silverware stashed at Ellis Park. I’d take the URC or the Challenge Cup. I really don’t mind. Santa, if you’ve made it this far, please, pretty please, can you make sure this one lands.
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Author : rugby-247
Publish date : 2024-12-24 10:15:41
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